I'm not going to lie, I'm struggling right now. Things for me aren't going great. I have no job, I have no money, I have no friends (in Texas City) and I have no life. I wake up, work out, watch TV, wait til night, sleep and repeat. If I don't get out of this ridiculous cycle soon, I don't know what's going to happen. I may very well go crazy. I mean, it's like I'm not even here according to my parents. I can't believe they haven't asked me to start paying rent.
What should I do? I really need some wisdom, help, direction in my life right now. Father, I pray for direction. Right now. Let me know that I'm not here by mistake but that you put me here in Texas City for some reason. Is it because I have been able to get closer with kids in Houston for Ozone? Is it to get closer to my family which may or may not be happening? I don't care what it is. I pray for some sort of revelation. Currently, I feel like a zombie because I have no purpose. I have no joy, no excitement, no adventure. I mean, when I was in school my purpose was to go to school. Now, I have no purpose. What am I living for? I've been trying my hardest to spend more time in the Word and more time with the Lord but I fall short constantly. How can I end this lukewarmness about my faith? I need to spend this time digging deep into the word and getting to know the Lord so much better during this time. I tell myself that everyday yet I don't do what I need to do and end up doing things that I don't want to do.
Sorry if this is a lot to handle, I need to vent. I need something good to happen soon or I don't know what I'm going to do. I need joy. Just joy.
1 comment:
Thanks for your honesty Hectee. Honestly, I feel that way a lot and I have fallen so short every day with getting in the word and turning to the Lord with everything... you're on the right track! Pray that you want your will to be His and he'll reveal something to you when the time is right. I love you and thanks for sharing your heart!
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