The Five

5. I need to find my five. I need to find my core group of five friends who I know will always be there when you need them. Well, not necessarily that but more like five friends who can always count on. I don't want to count on them to always be there but more to always help me out when I need it. I don't know if I have this yet, or at least I don't feel like I have this yet.

The other day, something pretty shitty was done to me by one of the people in my community (community - a really cheesy word Christians use to describe their group of friends, the people they live with, etc.). I won't explain what happened because it's too long to explain and frankly, I'm getting tired of talking about it. What it made me discover is that I really need to find my true community, my true group/core of about five friends. When this shitty thing happened to me, it really made me consider why I'm even friends with people like this anyway. To be honest, I feel like the people who bring most of the hurt and pain into my life are the people in my "community." These people make me feel left out, not good enough and unwanted. If I told them I felt this way, they would probably think I was crazy. I wish they knew that my spirit, literally cannot take anymore of heartache before I break down and lose it. I'm already at a really weird place regarding my relationship with the Lord and these believers that I live with aren't doing anything to help. If anything, they're pushing me farther and farther away. I told myself I would rather be alone and not talk to any of these people than to constantly be with them, getting hurt.

I'll continue this post later, I keep getting distracting by YouTube and my roommates

Sunday

So I know it's been a while since I've updated the blog. I've been having a really lazy weekend here at the Duncan because last weekend was so crazy.

I've been hanging out with Darrell, Daniel and Devin a lot. It's been a lot of fun. We're the oldest in the house and I'm pretty sure I'll be the oldest in the house when the new year starts. Oh yeah, I'll be living in Duncan tentatively unless I find somewhere more suitable for my to live. Until then, I'll be holding it down in the back room with Devin and Daniel. Darrell will be living here when he can find a job but he says that he'll be moving back to Brenham at the end of the month. Since we're the old balls in the house, we're just going to live together. It'll work out, I think.

Work has been going well. We're in the middle of a huge deadline that has be to completed by the end of the week, next week but I think we can get it. I'm trying to make it out to Ozark for at least a few days during fourth session but I don't know if I'll be able to. With work and it taking eight hours to drive up there, it doesn't seem like I'll be able to do it.

I'm still trying to complete this post, an hour and a half later. Sorry, I get distracted by Facebook and Twitter while I'm creating a post. Also, Darrell is in the room and he's yelling and distracting me even more. Anyway, this summer is shaping up to be a great one. I'm eager for fall weather and for football season to start. I'm also eager to see where this PGi job takes me. I've started explaining to my roommate and my friends how my political aspirations are very real and I would like to start pursuing that. I guess I can make them known here: I, Hector Garza (tentative (I'll explain later)) hereby publicly announce my intentions for running for Governor in the year 2034 and/or 2038. While it may sound funny, let me assure that it is not. Pretty soon, I (generally speaking) will be the "new" Republican. In the future and currently in the present, the minority will become the majority in Texas. If the all-white Republican party wants to continue it's reign in Texas then it's going to need to branch out to the current minority. The party, however, is in luck. There just so happens to be a young, 22 year old recent graduate of The University of Texas who would consider himself conservative that would love to be the new face of the conservative minority in Texas. I'm not doing this to exploit the minorities just because I see this potential problem and have asserted myself as the solution, but this has been a dream of mine for quite some time. I will talk about this more in another post but for now, be considering my vote.

The Last Month

So it's been a while since my last post; a lot has happened. I figured if I put a link to my blog on my PGiLive site (I'll explain) then I should probably update it more often. So, here it goes:

Well, as you know, I got a job here in Austin working at a company called PGi, a communications technologies company. Specifically, our Austin office is in charge of our website, www.pgi.com, check it out. I work on our content management team managing our Content Management System. It's been a lot of fun and I really like most of the people that I work with. We have a really cool office with most of the people being young. I've made some pretty good friends including some of the interns that I work with. Currently, we're interns but I think we will be there for a long time. At least a year, which is fine with me. If at the end of our three month contract, they offer us a bit more money I would take it and stay there. I still have the job working with Water Street so that's good.

I've been living in the Duncan house which has been so great. I really really like everyone in the house and the constant community here. I really enjoy it. I know the job with PGi will last for a while so I want to bring up the conversation of me living here for the next year. I know I have a full-time job but honestly, I don't think it's that much of a hassle.

I decided that I love officially living in Austin and I love everything about this town! Texas City is great for a while but Austin is where it's at. I really hope that I can start my professional life here. From 4th street to 13th street! The Texas Capitol!

Well, that's about as much as I can write right now. Here are some things you can be praying for:

-My relationship with Christ

-Finances

-Being a light in the workplace

-My relationship with my parents

-Baby Layla

-My spiritual, emotional and physical health

Faces Going Places

So huge updates: I GOT A JOB IN AUSTIN. It's a summer internship at a place called PGi or Premiere Global Services. Thanks to an old friend/roommate Weston, he hooked me up. I'm seriously beyond excited for this position. Not only will we have the sweetest working environment but I will be working with some amazing people. I want to learn and I want to be the hardest working intern there so I can earn a full-time position. So I was supposed to work full-time for Water Street but I think I'm just going to do it part-time and then go into real estate full-time eventually. I need to have two sources of income to help offset bills/loans and stuff. I figure everything I make from real estate can go towards my loans. I want to get those effers paid off in at least five years. The rents are getting pretty pissed at me and are on the verge of cutting me off. When I say on the verge I really mean they are cutting me off and making me pay for all of my bills (phone, insurance, car). Honestly, I was pretty pissed off at first but literally God came and soothed my heart and assured me that everything would be fine. I'm going to trust Him. I'm going to trust Him. I'm going to show my mother what faith is and I know that God will bring me through this.

In other news: I went to West U's last ozone of the year on Tuesday. This was probably my last ozone ever. It was sad. I know it wasn't Memorial's Ozone but it was still hard to sit through it knowing that the person who didn't hire me for the same job was sitting literally two feet from me. Memorial had their last ozone tonight. I thought about going but if I did, it would've been a sobfest on my part as well as Brad and Haley's. I'm not going to lie, I'm still not over what happen BUT I'M TRYING MY HARDEST. NOBODY IS PERFECT. My heart for Ozone was/is 100% and so was my commitment. Like I said on twitter, I wish things had played out differently but there was nothing I could do. Rumor is that they haven't hired anyone else for the position. Maybe they're hoping to find someone this summer for it. Whatever the situation, I'm still going to be praying for whoever is in that position as well as those kids cause that's who it's really about. Not me, not the Torn's, not any permanent staff but the kids. It was hard saying goodbye to some of my boys at West U. I'll see Travis and John again but probably not Robbe. He's off to play soccer in Kentucky. Crazy. I told him if he hates it to please transfer to Texas which he said would probably happen. John will be at Texas and Travis will be at Texas State. I'm excited for those kids but also apprehensive for trav and john. Being in Austin, hopefully I'll be able to guide John and steer him away from ridiculousness and drunkenness.

I should be moving to Austin for this job here pretty soon. I think I decided on where I'm going to live but I won't say anything just quite yet. I'm super excited and confident that God will have my back and provide for me spiritually, physically and financially. I'm excited for this next step in my life. Two years ago this week I took a huge chance by going to Ozark the entire year and look what happened, I had an amazing summer. Things will be great!

Prayers:
-The Squier family: Pops passed away last week. He was a great dad! Please be praying for the kids of the Squier family as well as his wife.

-Move to Austin: That God shows up like crazy!

-Pursuit of Christ: These are crazy times in my life and I need to be RUNNING towards the Lord. This week has been tough as some people who are the closest to me in my life have let me down. It's been tough but reassure me Lord that you have a plan and that it's going to work itself out

-My mother: that woman needs prayers straight up, each and everyway

-MEMORIAL OZONE: a new staff member and for kids there

-My Pops: that he gets this new job. He should find out here soon whether or not he gets an interview!

Taking Chances

So I realize that I haven't updated the blog in a while and I apologize for that. This past month has been pretty crazy. I started subbing (not sure if I talked about that in my last post) and that has been keeping me pretty busy. I told myself that I wanted to sub more days than not sub during the week (at least three days but most of the time four). It's been good, stressful I guess. It's hard when you go six months doing absolutely nothing, waking up whenever and coming and going as you please to having to wake up early and have real responsibility. I've been at Blocker (middle school) mostly. I'm currently in a three-day assignment subbing for eighth grade math in what I think is the worst team in eighth grade. Two of my classes have math both days (you're only supposed to have it once) and I have one regular class. I'm not going to lie, I've been pretty tired and my head has been hurting a lot these past couple of weeks. I don't know what it is. The week leading up to my trip to Austin was bad. I was having headaches and just feeling out of it. It's gotten better since then but today it sort of hit me again like a ton of bricks during my last period class. But, God did answer prayers today when I prayed that today would go smoother than yesterday. All of my kids want to cheat and they are the ones that failed the TAKS test. That's not going to do anything but not help them make it to the high school. It's going to be a reality check when that happens. Currently, they are at the top of the food chain but I wish they would realize that it's a long fall back to the bottom when you're a freshman.

In other news, Dad made it to the second round of the job process for this job at Valero. Apparently, this is the third that that he has made it this far, both times going past this round for the actual interview. Rumor is that if he can get an interview this time, the job would be almost sowed up. I've been praying about this everyday because I know how much this would mean to him to get this job. I really hope that he does get this. It would do a lot for the morale of the house and they could even buy a new house! If Dad were to get this job, they would pretty much be locked in here in Texas City which would be fine, I plan on moving back to Austin and I actually like Texas City in bits and pieces.

There's actually somethings brewing for me as far as the job hunt goes and for the time being. I'm still 100% doing the real estate thing but am looking for a part-time job in Austin to get me there ASAP. If it's part-time I can split time there and at the real estate office, learning and gaining knowledge on how to be a better real estate agent.

As far as Jesus goes, these past few days have been great. Church was great on Sunday and I've still been thinking about the sermon that I heard at Stone two weeks ago about having an enduring faith. I really want to have a faith that endures and that's been on my heart a lot these past couple of days. I know what could potentially lead me astray from the Lord and I need to work extra hard to recognize those temptations and make sure that I have accountability in my life. I'm going to try my hardest to endure whatever temptations, tests are thrown at my way.

What you can be praying for:
-This job opportunity in Austin. I won't say what it is because I don't want to give away too much information but it would pretty much be perfect for me and the time being.

-Subbing: That kids would be receptive to my requests. I think because I'm so young and because I look so young, it's hard for them to take me seriously.

-My Mom: she needs some joy in her life, I don't think she's happy

-My sister: she's going through some stuff with her "husband" and basically he's tripping out. She needs some intervention somehow. I refuse to get involved in any domestic disputes, haha

take me in

I remembered it's been a while since my last post so I wanted to update all my avid readers on life!

-So this week was my rescheduled jury duty assignment. I was originally supposed to have jury duty the week of the national championship but immediately reassigned because I still figured there was a small chance of heading out to Los Angeles. I was kinda looking forward to it because I figured I would be getting paid a little bit for it. So yesterday I reported for it and did not get picked. I didn't get picked for today or tomorrow as well. So I guess I have a spring break? Which is just continuation of the winter/summer break that I've had for the past seven months. haha

-Substituting is finally happening! I can start working as soon as spring break is over! I would like to be a full-time sub slash subbing everyday if possible. I need to start making money. Now.

-Still planning on doing Water Street. Waiting for the correct funds to come in and then everything will fall into place.

-It's late and I'm bored so I may make some brownies because I'm bored. Tuesday = LOST so I need to go watch that as well as American Idol

Dreams

I have a new life dream. My new life dream is to be six inches taller, grow a crazy beard, wear a lot of brown clothes and to learn how to play the guitar (way better), piano and the fiddle. My dream is to be a folk singer. Currently, Scott Avett has my job and I want it from him. I want to sing songs from great artists in the past like Townes Van Zandt, Merle Haggard, Willie Nelson among others. I'm completely serious. I've always wanted to be a musician entertainer and now I know that this is the kind of music that I would perform. There's so much energy and emotion in folk music; I think that says a lot about my life currently and in the past. It's all about feelings and experiences, it's the next best thing from the blues. I just want to show the world what's going on inside the head of a kid raised on the Bayou here in Southeast Texas who's also got some hill country in 'em. I want to put this city on the map. One of my dreams has been to become a famous folk musician and to put on a show for the hometown fans. I don't think there is a more rewarding feeling than doing this and I try to think about the Avett Brothers performing in North Carolina.

My favorite Avett song today: